Controversial · Feminism

My View on Abortion? It’s Complicated…

A quick note before I begin so everyone is clear and so no one makes assumptions (though I’m pretty sure I’m clear enough in my post):

  1. I am NOT anti-choice.
  2. I do not want abortions to be illegal- that is the stupidest thing anyone can do.
  3. I am not shaming women who get abortions (I don’t even say anything like that, but I thought I’d add this here just in case.) it is a very tough decision to make.
  4. There are valid reasons to get an abortion. (but that’s just my opinion)
  5. I am not trying to change anyone’s views.

Is that clear? Ok, let’s begin.


 

Ummmmm…

I really didn’t want to make this post, but I guess this is a place where I can freely speak my mind so I’ll go ahead and try. Although I put this in my feminism category, this isn’t a criticism of feminism, rather it’s simply a women’s rights issue, so I thought it fits best in here.

Abortion- a very sticky subject.

Let’s get straight to the point- I am pro-life.

It almost seems like a dirty word- ‘pro-life’. People think of misogynists who want to control women’s bodies. People who are anti-choice.

I know there are people out there like that. There are women who may even agree that they should have no choice in the situation whatsoever. I however take a different approach, and pro-life means something else to me.

People see foetuses as simply balls of cells. They’re not humans yet and they don’t deserve human rights. I disagree with this. And it’s not because I’m religious (I’m not). My mother is much, much more religious, but is more pro-choice than I am (she’s Catholic btw)

Basically I feel that abortion is akin to murder. It doesn’t feel right to support it when I’ve been taught all my life that it’s wrong to kill people, but then there are places you can go to legally kill someone? It’s kind of messed up. Still, although abortion is killing a human, it is actually very different to murder.

With straight up murder you have many other options other than to kill the person (most of the time) , with a pregnancy, it is literally only kill the baby, or go through the pregnancy. Something some pro-life people may not understand, which I wish had been highlighted in school when we discussed such topics, is that it’s not simply an issue of:

‘What am I going to do with the child?’

Adoption exists. It’s not the best solution but it’s not the worst. The real issue here is:

‘I’m going to have to sit through this pregnancy.’

This is what needs to be highlighted when talking about abortion. A women is literally forced to grow a human inside them, share their nutrients, deal with the problems and conditions related to pregnancy and, eventually, childbirth. If there’s one thing I hate about our biology, it’s pregnancy. Not completely. I’m sure if I got pregnant by choice, I’d probably enjoy most of it, but I hate how this is just imposed on women. If a woman gets raped, or if their contraception doesn’t work, they must grow this baby by force, or kill another fellow human. It’s really saddening. Honestly, it breaks my heart. I really feel for women in this sense.

On the other hand, I think about the child. This poor child had no choice in this. They had absolutely no choice. They didn’t ask to impose on their mother. They didn’t ask to cause the mother pain or inconvenience. They had absolutely no say. That’s why I hate abortion. The child is getting killed for simply existing. I hate the fact that a person can have so much power over someone else’s life. It’s disgusting. (and I am NOT saying that I hate or judge women who get abortions. Please don’t misunderstand!! It is a tough decision and pregnancy cannot be taken lightly. They are also a victim in this situation. I’m simply saying that I hate the fact that one person has so much power over the life of another and I’m going to make a post about that in the future, though not related to abortion).

I guess you could say that this stems from the fact that I hate that in the law, children are basically the property of their parents. It’s something that really disheartens me. Parents are allowed to indoctrinate their kids, circumcise them (though FGM is illegal in the UK) and stuff simply because they birthed them, but that’s a topic for another post.

So, IMO, is abortion acceptable?

Well, yes, in some ways. For example:

  • the woman might’ve been raped ( and while this isn’t rape, I’d also include situations in which men intentionally don’t use contraception and deceive the woman in consensual sex.)
  • the woman’s life may be at risk
  • the child is most likely going to die (during pregnancy or soon after birth)

I’m also considering the fact the case where a woman or man might’ve used contraception, but it didn’t work. And perhaps even if the woman used it incorrectly. Sure it’s their responsibility, but people make mistakes? I feel like I’m back-peddling.

There are probably other reasons I would accept. I just can’t think of them now.

I’d also like to add on to the second point. Having an abortion to save the mother’s life is essentially, swapping one life for another. You can essentially say that it’s not fair on the child especially because they never got the chance to live, but I can understand stand someone wanting to do anything to save their life- it’s a natural instinct. We want to live and will almost do anything to be able to. Who’s life is more important, the mother’s, or the baby’s? I think they are both equally important. Another reason is that the woman didn’t ask to be put in this predicament. Even if they knew in advance that this was a possibility, they tried, they saw there was no hope, and they had to choose between their own life, or the life of a person they hardly know. It may sound cruel, but it’s perfectly understandable.

About the third point: this is partly because there’s really no reason to go through that pregnancy, just to go through the emotional turmoil and depression when they give birth to a stillborn, after building that mother-child relationship. This can also be partly for the child. It’s something I only just considered, but wouldn’t it be better to end the suffering early, rather than prolonging it? I do have issues with this of course. What if the baby would’ve actually survived? Is it right to take life away? This reminds me of the debates around euthanasia, which I have less of an issue with (my only concerns being are they being coerced to die? are they in the right state of mind? Is it okay to force medical staff to do it?) The difference here is that the baby cannot consent.

But in the end, does my opinion matter? Who am I to say who can and can’t have an abortion. I don’t have the right to dictate people and what they choose to do. That’s the libertarian in me speaking out. I am simply a kid (basically a kid) who has never had to deal with such situations. What about the women and young girls who, for them, this is a very real situation? And that’s another one, should kids get abortions? My first thought is ‘Yes but only if they want one and they should not be coerced by their families to have/not have the baby’. That’s the part of me that wants kids to have some power over their lives speaking.

In the end, while I consider myself pro-life first and foremost, I would also consider myself pro-choice. I want women to be free and have power over their bodies. This sort of creates a cognitive dissonance. I want to protect and fight for both camps, but that’s not possible. I thought the featured image captures how I feel about abortion very well.

Is it really that simple?
It’s not that simple

*sigh* This is all very complicated…

The human body, eh?

~Peanut

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