I’ve been putting off this post for a while now. I mentioned it in an update but that was ages ago ^^; but here it is now.
The Grace Saga continues.
Now you probably don’t know who Grace is. Grace Grasslands (obviously not her real name) is a friend I made in secondary school. We were super close, maybe too close (not implying anything sexual btw, get yo’ mind outta the gutter), and then in our final year we fell out and our friendship just ended like that. About that time I referred to her as ‘backstabber’ on my old blog. In sixth form (because we went to the same one) we talked a little, but nothing really came out of that.
Now fast forward a year or two and here’s me on facebook for the first time in a couple weeks trying to follow this society from my uni on facebook and I find that someone had messaged me. I assumed it was someone from origami society as that’s often where we communicate, but no.
It was from Grace.
“Hey! How are you
This kinda took me by surprise. I wasn’t expecting her to message me. The thing is, this summer, and even before then, I started thinking about her, and it would always get me down. Like I said, we were so close and I hated that we weren’t friends anymore. I still didn’t know how I was about to start talking to her, but I guess it happened.
I replied back to her:
“Sorry I don’t use facebook that much so haven’t been checking it”
“I’m good, how are you?”
(Have in mind, my response was a week or two after hers) She responded back fairly quickly and we started talking. She told me about how she missed me and how we were so close. I told her the same.
Soon we exchanged numbers and continued on WhatsApp and she’s been messaging me a lot. And a mean a lot. Can’t even remember half the conversations, but I guess it’s nice to have someone say ‘good morning’ to you often. We’ve talked on the phone a few times as well and it’s almost surreal. It’s almost like before- talking so easily like this. It’s obvious we’ve both changed, but it feels like the old days. It makes me really happy, it does, but I can’t help but always remember that I wasted time would could’ve spent together over a stupid fight. I’m not sure either of us remember what it even was about.
Talking on the phone reminds me of how I really took for granted the fact that we could always see each other. Every day. Now we can’t because she’s in another city up north. The next time I could probably see her Christmas maybe, if she comes home, which she doesn’t seem interested in doing which I personally understand- family can get annoying.
I’ve filled her in on some things that have happened since. I had planned to tell her about the whole Phoenix thing, because while she knew Phoenix and I we’re close, she didn’t know I had the world’s biggest crush on her. Of course that would’ve meant coming out, and I guess I hesitated a bit, for a couple of reasons. One was that we were on the phone when I was going to bring it up and obviously my family are here. Two was that it was fucking awkward. Three was that apparently I told her I was asexual AND I had told her that I didn’t believe I would ever like girls (because at the time I didn’t really have that much interest in (3D) girls- or I didn’t know it).
I did eventually come out to her, but that was after she brought up that SHE was bisexual and that she’d actually had sex with a girl (though she wasn’t sure it was sex but she did use that word). I just had to come out to her then because she had also said that she couldn’t see herself liking girls. It was pretty funny and we ended up laughing about it.
Side note: this is like the 4th female friend that has admitted to finding girls attractive. Don’t judge, but I’m beginning to think all girls are secretly Sapphic! (lol, I kid). Honestly, women are actually amazing- Mochi doesn’t know what he’s missing.
So I brought up the Phoenix thing and she told me that she did know that Phoenix had a girlfriend- a girl who also went to our secondary school- but not that I had a crush on her. Tbh, I thought it was quite obvious, but not even Phoenix knew until I told her. Well, that’s another side note.
So that’s it really. I guess there wasn’t that much to add. Well, there’s a little more, but I think I want to keep it to myself until I understand the situation a little better. But all in all, it looks like Grace is here to stay- in my life, I mean. She has proclaimed many times that I will not be able to get rid of her that easily and I share the same sentiment. I won’t let her get away that easily again >:)
[Obviously had to censor her name and her pic (and mine). I hope she doesn’t see this, lol *sweats profusely*]