Feminism · Gender · Media · Personal · Race

Anti-Feminism and My Journey

Somehow I’m feeling motivation to write a proper post so I’m going to take this chance.

So, yeah, as the title says, this is about anti-feminism. I’m just going to speak a little about it, because I don’t really think I have.

I become antifeminist in 2017, so I was in the community for about a year, and sort of still associate with them. I was originally in the feminist crowd prior to that, but never knew anything about feminism and never called myself a feminist (except for that one time I was trying to impress Phoenix, of course). Before I crossed over, I was trying to save the word feminist. I was going to antifeminist videos and trying to tell people that

“Hey, some feminists are bad, but it’s not all feminist! We just want equality!”

Of course I knew nothing about feminism, only that people know the ‘stereotypical’ feminist (obese, blue hair, ugly) and that was just that- a stereotype. I started to learn more about feminism through watching antifeminist videos. I had never really watch feminist videos because I had zero interest in that. I began to see people debunking feminist theories/ideas/claims. For example the pink tax and the infamous wage gap. I also began to see how some feminists were demonising men and always comparing women to men which I found inherently unfeminist.

By the time I was fully integrated into the antifeminist circle, I began to learn about female supremacy and corruption. That for some people, feminism was simply a business they were profiting from.

As an antifeminist I was always scrounging around for new antifeminist YouTube channels and more videos. Videos debunking arguments made from feminist YouTubers, often the common ‘bedroom feminist’- known as the most earnest, but also the most naïve (“Antifeminists aren’t feminists because feminism has ‘femme’ in it”- That’s a huge generalisation, but I’ve seen it a lot). There were also loads of response videos to those big in the feminist community such as Riley Dennis and Kat Blaque.

I started seeing more response videos to intersectional feminists- the type who demonised cis white straight males. Those kinds of feminists really got my blood boiling because I just fucking hate discrimination of any kind. That was the kind of stuff that made me want to make my own content and ‘fight’ against ‘feminism’.

It came to a point where I was pretty much only watching anti-feminist content. It would be the same Riley Dennis response video made by several different creators and I’d watch them all. I was essentially trapped in this echo chamber, away from other views and opinions. Antifeminists often accuse feminists for being in echo chambers (and a lot of them are), but it was also true for some antifeminists. Though there were a lot of antifeminist creators who called for debates and wanted to invite people to their channels.

I was happy when Blaire White held a debate with Contrapoints, Indigo Foxe and Laci Greene. I was glad that Roaming Millenial did a collab with Milo Stewart. Feminists and Antifeminists (who actually care about equal rights) should be having more conversations and sharing ideas. Rather than doing response videos and cringe compilations (though I’m guilty of watching a few, I won’t deny. Cringe is addictive).

To get myself out of my own echo chamber, I started looking for feminist channels. It was hard though, a lot of the ones I knew pissed me off a lot. I knew I had to avoid those who talked about race- they tended to be racist (no surprises there). I wanted to find feminists who knew what they were talking about, were fairly nice and not bigoted, and were fairly open to other opinions.

I was already subscribed to Ash Hardell. Even while I was in the middle of my ‘hating feminism’ phase, I still remained subbed to her because she’s a nice person. She mostly talks about LGBT+ stuff and I don’t tend to watch that anymore. It can get a little annoying, I have to admit. I was subbed to her because at the time I identified as non-binary and she did her ‘The ABCs of LGBT” series (I even have the book… I was so obsessed). At the time I was looking for my perfect gender label. I also was asexual so I liked learning about the split attraction model and all that good stuff. I don’t ID as asexual anymore, just so you know.

I had subbed to ContraPoints after watching Blaire White’s debate with her. She was pretty reasonable and I was like “Hey, I like pretty reasonable people!” And then I got to her channel and was like “…What the fuck is this???” And then subbed instantly. XD

Also, when Laci Greene decided to have more conversations with the ‘Antis’ (such a weird term) I was like, “Fuck yeah, teach me about feminism and- oh you do sex ed too? Sure I don’t mind learning about that.” I think she mostly focuses on Sex ED but if she does any feminism videos, I’ll be sure to watch.

I also the The1Janitor who was also pretty reasonable. I watched a couple of his stuff. There was also demotivatoropinion who, honestly, I didn’t like that much, but an antifeminist/sceptic youtuber called MissMisa said she watches his videos so I’ve been catching his videos every now and then. I still don’t like him that much, but he doesn’t seem like a bad person.

So I started to calm it with the antifeminism content. It’s not like I ‘converted’ into feminism, but I learnt about the actual wage gap and what white privilege actually is. The wage gap is hugely misunderstood by many people, but Dr Jordan Peterson (who I actually LOVE) actually puts it quite well in his channel 4 interview with Cathy Newman. The wage gap is real, unlike a lot of antifeminists would say. While some of it is due to the careers women take and the fact that women are less likely to ask for raises and are more likely to take time off, a small part of it cannot be explained by any of those factors and may be based simply on discrimination. White privilege… I don’t think I know that much about it so I don’t really want to speak about it. I was prompted to watch this dude called Tim Wise speak about it. Here’s a clip of him speaking about it, but I’d like to say that I don’t know that much about history- I’m more of a math and science gal. So if anything he’s saying is incorrect, please tell me in the comments, I’m all about learning more. I’d also like to say that I don’t believe white privilege is something that exists today in our societies. I believe it can still affect us, for example, the situation with a lot of black people in America. Some alt-righters like to say it’s IQ. Some antifeminists like to say it’s because black people just don’t want to get married. I think it can’t be that simple. This was an idea that I got from a youtuber called Destiny. I don’t know if he’s progressive or not. All I know is that some people find him annoying, but he seems like a smart guy to me. I cannot remember the video where he talks about it to save my life, but check out his debates and conversations. I’m not entirely sure, but it seems he disagrees with race realism. My opinion (don’t hate me for this) I do somewhat agree with race realism, but I don’t believe all black people have IQs in the range of 70-80 (or whatever the value claimed by the bell curve). I myself have an IQ of 113 (it was tested when I did the dyslexia screening). I also don’t believe that we should treat people with lower IQs as lesser. I absolutely detest ableism. It’s probably one of the -isms I feel strongest about.

That was sort of a huge tangent- back on topic…

So where am I now in my ‘journey’? Well, now I’m trying to do an antifeminist detox (meaning, I want to remove the antifeminist ‘toxins’ from my body…?). I’m trying to get back to watching things I like. Things like science, comedy and, most recently, mental health. I’m still watching a few channels. People like Sargon of Akkad, for example, and other people who talk about politics because I believe it’s important. Every now and then I’ll watch an antifeminist video- I just watched an Undoomed one today- but honestly I sick of antifeminism and I’m sick of feminism. I’m not going to call myself an antifeminist anymore, nor am I going to call myself a feminist. This is for three reasons.

  1. Calling myself feminist just because I believe in things that every decent human being should believe in (in my opinion) doesn’t seem to make sense. It’s like calling yourself ‘anti-racist’ (which is what some people actually call themselves…)
  2. Calling myself feminist (or even antifeminist) is (in my opinion) identifying yourself as part of the feminist (or antifeminist) cult. Then you get sucked into echo chambers. Of course, this doesn’t always happen
  3. I want to reserve that term for activists. I am not an activist. I do not fight for gender specific issues women face (which is what feminism truly is in it’s core- it’s not gender equality and it does not advocate for the gender specific issues of men (and I like it like that. It’s the job of Men’s Rights Activists. They do it best and they should not be hindered by feminists))

I’ll finish this post off with my current view on feminism:

I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this before, but I believe that women have the same rights as men, and maybe even more, in Western society. That being said, I especially sympathetic to men and MRA in Western countries. That being said, feminism is still needed in the world. Western feminists need to redirect their energy and activism towards women in other countries who are still fighting for rights. These women who are essentially treated as property, cum buckets, and baby makers. We need to end FGM (and MGM which is conveniently never called that and just called circumcision). We need to stop worrying about what men think about women and start worrying about women who are abused and treated like children by their fathers and even husbands- women who actually don’t have rights.

And moving into intersectionality: let’s stop worrying about cultural appropriation and microaggressions, and start thinking about how we can help raise racial minorities (The so called “People of Colour”) out of the vicious cycle of poverty.

My views on Nonbinary-ism are still evolving and I’ll share them in a future post, I promise.

Well, that’s all I have to say this time round. I hope this was somewhat interesting. Hopefully this will be (at least one of) the last time(s) I talk about feminism. Though I hope to still talk about gender stuff. The antifeminism community is so weird though. It’s this huge group of people with different political views and ideologies. Don’t get me wrong, the antifeminist/sceptics I’ve known and watched their content have been mostly pretty great people. A lot of them are pretty open-minded and like discussion. Still, I think I’ve had enough of antifeminism to last me for a lifetime… ^^;



2 thoughts on “Anti-Feminism and My Journey

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